
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Pumpkins
Monday, October 20, 2008
Justin's Dad's Side
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Fall

Thursday, October 9, 2008
The Saddest Day, Continued

Thanks everyone for all the sweet e-mails and such. It's nice to hear people understand that the grief feels pretty similar to losing a dear friend or family member. The Kid initially seemed OK, sad, but not terribly weepy. Almost purposely ignoring it. And then I got a call from his school yesterday because he was going crazy, crying, screaming and thrashing when they tried to comfort him. He said that a little girl had stolen his baby brother's eggplant hat, (because she was wearing a similar one.) Well, it wasn't really about a hat, I guess he just needed an outlet to finally break down. Kids are so complicated! After that, it was easier for him to talk about everything. This morning, we talked a bunch more because he dropped some breakfast on the floor and said, without thinking, "Whoops! Dub will get it." We made a little memory table with pictures, her collar, favorite toys, and things like that. The vet smartly warned us not to use the phase "put to sleep" around little kids because it scares them about sleeping... Which I'm sure I would have thought of normally, but being upset, maybe not. So, anyway, we are all doing fine. Missing Dublin, but life moves forward, as it should.
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
The Saddest Day
We had to have Dublin put to sleep this morning. She developed a virus that made all the muscles in her face swollen so she could not eat or drink. She also had cancer and the vet said that the huge steroid dose that may, or may not have helped her muscles relax would super-speed the cancer. It actually seemed as if, even if we hadn't have had her put down, she would have gone by the end of the day anyway. She couldn't see or even raise her head, although right before the vet did what she had to do, Dublin lifted her head and licked Justin's face once.
I have never had to do this before, even though I grew up with all sorts of animals, and lost pets. It was always my parents, or a car, or the butcher... One of the hardest things ever. I guess we must have seemed in pretty rough shape because even the vet was crying. She was just part of our family. I was really thankful that the kid was in school, and that this all happened quickly, not dragging on for weeks. It would have been terrible to watch her get worse and worse, and I knew it was coming soon, but still, it was so quick, too quick. We weren't ready. And tonight there are no toenails clattering up the stairs to her bed next to Eli's, No give-away collar jingle when she's sneaking a drink out of the toilet, No turn-turn-turn-thump-sigh as she lays down, no wet nose nudging my hand.
We buried her at Mom and Dad's, right above the patch of flox and below the swing and maple tree. The bare patch of ground was covered with red and gold leaves by evening.
Goodbye Dubber Doggie. We loved you. I am so sorry for all the times you got left behind because the car seats take up so much room now. I wish I'd let you sniff the grass longer when I walked you in the rain instead of dragging you back inside. I should have let people feed you from the table more often when you begged. We could have taken you swimming more this summer because that was your favorite thing. I'm sorry you weren't in the family portrait I took last week, I wanted you to be, it just seemed like such a hassle to hang on to kids, camera, AND leash. I'm so sorry. You were a good, good girl.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)